slightly too honest

Declaring this year's programme to be the best ever, Julian Caddy of Sweet venues writes in Three Weeks:

HOW DO YOU PICK THE SHOWS IN YOUR PROGRAMME?

Turn out the lights, throw all the applications into the air and grab as many as we can in five minutes. The remainder we discard.

It's presumably tongue-in-cheek, but.. could it be true? No. Not at all.

Caddy has, however, missed out one vital step taken by every venue director: throw out any applictions from companies trying to plead for a special cheap deal on account of their unique circumstances, special talents, bad luck etc. etc.

yes, we have pedantry

The cheapest part of an advertising campaign can turn out to be the most expensive part if you don't hire someone who can proof-read. So far, this includes forgetting to include show-times, venues and the name of your adapated-from-the-screenplay unlicensed drama.

At the very least, remember that no-one is an "industrial staple" of anything, unless they are made from a sturdy tungsten blend. It's also quite awkward when that kind of clunky prose turns up in a collective ad campaign which should have been read by at least one promoter.

Still, nice clip-art.

clarity

A friend asks us to clarify that the page count in the Fringe programme is exactly as intended - and the content was certainly not stretched out at the last moment when the printers mentioned they thought they were printing something that was a different size, based on last year's edition.

It's also vital to note that such a story hasn't been pinging around email and Facebook for a month. 'Cos it just ain't true.

And that, too, is a denial.

am has ur talents?

SO.. things we like so far:

- the prospect of a giant silent disco in McEwan Hall, even if roaming flash-mobs are doing the same thing for free.

- real fire extinguishers filled with foam, rather than amusing springy snakes, giving us a slim chance of survival in thrillingly fire-exit free venues.

- the potential of summary artistic judgment via the medium of the internet trend known as LOLCATS:

Things that don't impressa-me-much:

- edfringe.com's attempt at terms and conditions which demand permission for every link to their site. It's pretty much the reverse of how the internets work, y'all. Here's hoping we don't break that rule. Oops. There we go again.

- incredibly expensive tickets for out-of-town-centre events. We love extravagant physical circus theatre funtime in custom venues, but £25 to visit a tent at Ocean Terminal? Not so much.

Still, we're sure we'll end up there because they have bus ads. Now that's International Festival style spending..

In other words, we're back. See you at the Fringe launch party?